mercredi, novembre 09, 2005

Terry McMillian's Groove Was Gay and Its Gonna Take Her a Long Time to Exhale

"But it had been from the first her great mistake -- to meet him, to marry him, to love him as she so bitterly had. Looking at his face, it sometimes came to her that all women had been cursed from the cradle; all in one fashion or another, being given the same cruel destiny, born to suffer the weight of men. Frank claimed that she got it all wrong side up; it was men who suffered because they had to put up with the ways of women --- and this from the time they were born until the day they died. But it was she who was right, she knew; with Frank she had always been right; and it had not been her fault that Frank was the way he was determined to live and die a common nigger"
-----James Baldwin, Go Tell It On the Mountain

When I saw that Terry McMillian and her ex-husband Jonathan Plummer were going to be on Oprah today, I made sure to TIVO my television. I couldn't help but be saddened by the events that I saw. Can black women get a break??? The betrayal and the deception that she must have felt. For all who do not know the story, Terry McMillian, the best selling author of books such as Waiting to Exhale, Mama, Disappearing Acts and How Stella Got Her Groove back, recently announced that her 6 1/2 year marriage to Jamacian born Jonathan Plummer was ending, following his revelation to her that he was gay. Since then, the two of them have appeared publicly albeit separately on several nationally syndicated programs such as the Tavis Smiley Show, Good Morning America, etc. but never together, until now.

As I expected, Jonathan made several absurd statements such as he didn't know he was gay until two years ago, he didn't use Terry, he didn't cheat on her and blah, blah, blah. Men and their lies.... The things that women put up with. The episode of course dealt with issues such as the Down Low, cheating, etc. Though I'm not currently in a relationship, this episode made me grateful. Trust and honesty are intregal to a relationship and it seems like lately, in our society, this has been taken for granted.

"I have only one solution: to rise above this absurd drama that others have staged around me"
----- Franz Fanon